Posts Tagged ‘parenting’

Odadeo.com: social network for dads

How am I going to be a better dad? on Odadeo, the social network for fathers
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I just discovered and joined odadeo.com, a social network for dads. The site says it’s in ‘nearly there’ beta, but it’s open to the public now while still in beta. I just created my profile in a few minutes, and added a few badges (describing what kind of dad I am) and a few pledges (what kinds of things I’d like to improve or do to be a better dad).

Of course, I linked my twitter and blog there, so I’m firmly entering into the daddy blog arena, I think. How’s that for a tentative statement, eh? 🙂

Anyway, now you can find me on odadeo.com. I’m “sillydaddy”. If you don’t see me for a few days, it’s because I’m fiddling around with badges and pledges and stuff.

the appearance of the school-going monster

our little monster

our little monster

Well, it’s happened, although in a different way than last year. Last year we had a mouthy JK-er. This year our little adorable nearly 4 yo has turned into a stubborn, opinionated, defiant child. Sometimes.

We’re not sure what it is. DW and I theorize that it has to do with the varied stresses on the routine, just being at school, adjusting to new things. We’re not sure, though. But this time around, we weren’t as surprised when it happened.

So what do we do about it? Well, we talk. A lot. Maybe that’s our failure, is that we talk too much. But we sit down and have a time out, and a talk about why screaming “NO!!!” and wrestling with her older sister is not a great behavioural choice. We’ve been successful at getting them to talk about how things make them feel, and how we should express those things to each other. But boy, it can be hard to keep your own head when everyone is screaming at each other! Sometimes you just want to charge in and yell “STOP!” I’ve tried that. It usually isn’t very effective. You’re just adding to the mayhem. Better a calm and even voiced approach.

I guess time outs work for kids AND parents. 🙂

a correlation

I’ve noticed in the mornings a correlation between how the kids behave and whether or not I do the dishes before leaving for school & work.

If I do the dishes, the kids seem to take that as a cue to behave, play nicely, and get ready when I’m finished without trouble.

If I don’t do the dishes, the kids get into trouble, don’t get ready when asked, and we might be late.

I wonder why this is? Is it because they see me doing housework, so things are being taken care of, and orderly, and so they respond in like manner? Or is it because when I don’t do the dishes, I’m surfing the net instead or doing something else, which is a signal to them that “Dad isn’t paying attention, let’s act up”? Do the kids pick up on orderliness to that great a degree? Sheesh. Who knew being a parent came with so much responsibility? 🙂

how did I do this?

How did I manage to raise a mouthy stubborn almost-5 year old?

I should explain. The Linguist is my oldest. She’ll be 5 in January. She’s intelligent, capable, reads incredibly well, is learning piano, loves to draw, know her way around OSX and Windows… all the things a geek dad could hope for.

But when she gets mad, she’s so mouthy and rude, I don’t know where this comes from. She started school in September, and this is kind of when it started, but is it just that? I can’t imagine that the other kids are being that mouthy to the teacher, but who knows? To their own parents? Is she overhearing kids arguing with their parents? It’s a mystery to me. Maybe it’s TV. Some of those characters on Arthur or B. G. can be pretty mouthy too.

I guess in the old days you’d call it ‘talking back’. Continue reading